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5 Co-Parenting Tips for When You and Your Ex Don’t Get Along

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Divorce can be a real messy situation especially when the couple involved turn sour and have since developed a contentious relationship. However, this situation has a negative impact on the child especially making parenting a whole lot stressful and difficult. Whether the couple were married and divorced through the help of a divorce lawyer in Utah or not, resentments make parenting difficult.

With the children in the picture, especially after hiring a child custody attorney in Utah to secure total custody but to no avail, it is important to play the part of the parent irrespective of the contentious relationship with your ex.

Wondering how to maintain a perfect relationship with your child or children despite the bad blood between you and your ex? Here are a few suggestions which we expect will help you better manage the situation.

  1. Communicate

Communication is key in every relationship and chances are you separated because of lack of communication. For the kids, communication is important as both parents make arrangements on when to see the children. It is important to avoid using the children as a go-between in delivering messages. Proper communication should be done regarding school runs, over the phone conversations, visits, and other related issues. A mediator may be hired in instances where the divorced parties can’t be reconciled. Additionally, it is important to choose the best possible method of communication which both parties think will work best.

Chances are, your children will learn a lot from you if you are able to work things out without quarreling.

  1. Be Consistent

In making life better for your children following the divorce, it is advisable that you and your ex-stay consistent and on the same page as regards agreed on schedules either for visitations or for outings. Whether you have shared custody, primary, or visitation, both parents should strive as much as possible to put on a united front, all arguments and quarrel can come behind the scenes. Additionally, avoid a screaming match as much as possible.

When children move from home to home, it should especially be important that co-parents stick to a rigid structure which allows the child know when he is spending time with the dad or the mum and other modalities so they can adjust better to the new life they have been offered.

  1. Do Not Let Your Children Get Caught in the Crossfire

Avoid putting your children in the crossfires of your failed relationship. Most often than not, the child is not the reason for the divorce and as such, they should be excused from passive or active aggressions which may be build up as a result of the happenings in and around. In the event you aren’t getting along fine with your ex, the children are not the cause of the current predicament and as such should not be treated to emotional trauma. Putting on a full frontal attack on your ex in front of your children or asking them to pass messages across will get them caught in the crossfires thereby jeopardizing their relationship with you and the other parent. Additionally, this type of situation may cause a mental breakdown due to additional stress for the child.

  1. Put Yourself in Your Ex’s Shoes

Before making a decision, it is important to weigh both the pros and cons. Despite being broken up and divorced, when the situation calls for it, before making any drastic changes or taking drastic decisions, it is important to consider your children and the other parent. Should you be having a disagreement, take a step back to objectively understand and reason along the other parent’s line of view. This will especially go a long way in making you a great parent and co-parent in the relationship. Additionally, this basic step could save you a lot of time and energy which would otherwise have gone into arguments.

  1. Remember, Your Children Come First

In any decision you make, be sure you put the children first. Any decision you make that negatively affects the children keeps them one step farther away from you.