Going through a divorce can be one of the most difficult experiences you will go through in life. But a divorce is not only difficult for you and your spouse. It will also be a challenge for your children. This is especially true if you’re going through a difficult divorce and have had to hire a Suffolk County contested divorce attorney to represent you. No divorce is extremely happy, but some can be particularly vicious and extremely arduous for the whole family.
Below, we’ll outline some of the best tips for speaking to your children about your divorce. Using this advice won’t alleviate all of the pain and suffering that your children will endure during this process, but it will help make the transition easier, and it will also help ensure that your children constantly know they are cared about.
- Talk to your children together when possible.
It’s best to speak to your children as parents. This means you both do the talking together as a couple. Naturally, this isn’t how you see yourself right now. But it is how you want your kids to see you. Even if there are hard feelings between the two of you, it’s essential to put your children first.
- Have a plan.
Don’t go into “the divorce talk” blind. You and your spouse should plan what you’re going to say. If you don’t have a plan beforehand, one spouse may end up saying something that the other spouse finds untrue or offensive, and the whole talk could blow up into a parental fight. This is exactly what you don’t want to do in front of your children.
- Be open to questions.
As you speak to your kids about your impending divorce, encourage them to ask questions. You can likely foresee what questions they’ll ask: where they’re going to live, whether you and your spouse still love each other, whether you still love them, why you can’t work it out, how long you have known you wanted to separate. Try to answer all of these questions between the two of you beforeapproaching your kids so that you have set answers in place when they ask.
- Keep them away from the litigation.
Litigation in a divorce can get nasty. Ideally, your Suffolk County contested divorce attorney will help you keep the arguing over assets and bargaining over property to a minimum — for everyone’s sake. But in some cases, there will be “heated” encounters. In these situations, make sure that children are nowhere near the arguing and bargaining. They don’t need to be involved in these decisions, and they shouldn’t be.
Contacting a Lawyer for Your Divorce
The best way to make a divorce go smoothly is to hire a Suffolk County contested divorce attorney right off the bat. This will ensure that proceedings start and end quickly and that you get what you deserve in the proceedings. If you are seeking a divorce from your spouse, contact a reputable and experienced divorce attorney in your area today.